changed several account passwords to “reflect, don’t fix.”
Everything that I could do to saturate my heart and mind with
this thought was helpful.
Reflect has a twofold meaning. When confronted with
a situation, stop and reflect before speaking. In addition, when
in the presence of another’s frustration, offer words of
reflection and empathy rather than suggestions on how to
make it all better. In other words, mirror the other person.
As is almost always the case, when I set my mind and
heart toward a specific intent, situations arise to allow me to
practice. One of our girls is passionate, opinionated, and always
willing to speak up about injustice. I love these things about
her. Giving voice to such a tender and fiery heart is critical, and
coaching her on how to present such passion in a way that
others can hear and receive is sometimes a challenge. She has
written the president, governor, county commissioners, and
police department expressing her myriad concerns and ideas.
During her fifth grade school year, she decided to write
to a few of the teachers at her school about a perceived
injustice around recess time. I was vaguely aware that she was
rather secretively working on this and offered just two
thoughts as she worked through her words. “Be respectful and
you need to sign your name.” I did not read the letters.
The next day as she plopped in the car after her day at
school, she muttered, “Well that didn’t go so well.” In follow
up, it became clear that one of the adult letter recipients was