Pictures were taken, and she was able to be a part. We
traveled to the church. She and I located restrooms, talked,
wandered, and agonized. I tried to comfort and be steady and
realistic. It was emotionally draining. It would be devastating
for her to miss the wedding or the reception, or both. Our
family really likes to eat and dance and celebrate together…
And then, I had clarity. We made one last dash to the
bathroom. This was definitely a stomach bug. Once I leaned
into what was and quit straining for what I wished to be, calm
came over me, the mother of the groom. Our dear and gracious
sister and brother-in-law took her to their hotel room. She was
in good hands. I was relieved. As much as I wanted her there,
now I could be fully present for our son. And the wedding
It was beautiful and poignant and my heart swelled
with love for this boy who was entrusted to our care for such
a short time. He heard words of wisdom, spoke powerful
vows, and made and received promises as this new family was
formed. It was holy ground and a celebration. My mother’s
heart was delighted and full.
Our peaked girl walked into the reception for a few
moments but knew she needed to be elsewhere to give honor
to her own body and situation. We all felt sad that she wasn’t
among us as we ate and laughed and danced. She had made fast
friends on Friday with a 6th grade boy from New York City
while kicking a soccer ball and playing video games. His mom
reported that he had a thing for sassy girls and was so sad to
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