able to be more real about the complexities of my choices and
actions, even the decision to adopt our daughters.
At this point in my journey, I feel embarrassed when I
think back to my earliest perspective and reasons for becoming
an adoptive mom. As the voices within American
evangelicalism called loudly for Christians to adopt, many
responded. Organized movements such as Orphan Sundays
continue to take place in many evangelical churches every year.
A brand of Christian colonialism is often a part of the message.
The call to adopt is sometimes hailed as a way to “save the
children” in both pragmatic and spiritual ways. There are
beautiful stories of welcoming children into family, culture,
and religion. However many of these stories have a self
congratulatory spin and paint an incomplete picture. They
rarely give honor to the devastation and pain that are the
foundation of the experience for any adopted child or birth
The underlying realities, forces, and stories that make
up each individual adoption scenario are extremely complex.
The reasons that a child ends up unable to grow up with their
birth family or in their birth country are many. None of the
explanations are happy. Often the evangelical call to adoption
glosses over this truth. As I approached the idea of adoption,
I did not fully comprehend the underlying devastation of the
story I was about to join.